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Her-ling (n., v.): Olympics-Level TV Reality Show Female Bashing

10 May

Self-esteem is just bad TV. In the industry that means “bad” for ratings, as in not entertaining.  Or so it seems by today’s prevailing littered landscape of cheap-to-produce reality shows. And our female role training is incomplete without some good ole culturally traditional women-on-women trash talkin’, table flippin’, hair pullin’ hataration. A Parents Television Council (PTC) study has shown that the channel targeting youth most, MTV, uses women to sell female humiliation. And oh yes it is! possible to become de-sensitized to insensitivity.

The only TV reality show contrary to this female-hating/-demeaning trend that pops to mind is ‘Bethenny Ever After’. But in its season two, even this show has become a therapy-lint-gazing, self-promoting, Skinny-marriage-on-the-rocks-Girl commercial. Great. The only one of us who is celebrated and represented by the media as “making it,” (edit, inconclusive to date :has to resort to bloating her financial worth, and by acting like a Showboaty, Inspiration-dispensing Blingy Oprah-bot to be deemed interesting enough for us to watch.

Ladies, work your ADD-trained media memory way back to two whole party Saturdays ago when the Rodney King/LA race riots had their 20th. The most famous, ungrammatical phrase of that event applies to the vast majority of women on reality TV: “Can we all just get along?” I don’t know. Can we, chicas?

To further put my challenge in reality TV show speak: “I am a growed ass wo-man who don’t know why other biotches can’t just stop their hating, and get each other’s back.” In other words, maturity and self-esteem (vs. ginormous ego) are ratings killers, so you will just have to go experience these things to practice and build them off-line, in the Real World and work on it for yourself. No script. No season storyline. No instant fame whoring gratification for being famous as a fame whore.

As unglam as that sounds, trust me, the rewards are high, sustainable and doesn’t produce belly fat, muffins.

Here are a few resources to help you and/or the young and impressionable females in your life understand and challenge how the media represents, packages and sells “acceptable female” images right back to us all:

Dove’s Self-Esteem workshop toolkit.

Miss Representation.

The Gena Davis Insitute.

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© 2010-2012 Simone da Rosa and PopSmartsZen™. All rights reserved.

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VICTIMS? The Inciteful Tale of Rush Said, Kirk Said

11 Mar

 

Ooh snap!, both Rush Limbaugh and Kirk Cameron can make a usually non-politicking but opinionated gal pop a sugarcoated Advil off-cycle. Now that the Twittersphere and beyond fervor surrounding their respective anti-women, anti-gay but unified anti-sex messages has subsided an iota, I was faced with a very angry friend’s Wrath of Kan You Believe That S**t?!@*#$%?! delayed reaction.

Since I’d just conveniently got my old Underdog U cheerleading outfit back from the cleaners, at first, I was all high kicks and hoots egging her (a woman with active gonads and a gay brother) on. But then—and I don’t know if it was just that her third Whatever-tini kicked in, or if her more deeply seeded anger than I blissfully ever knew lay in deadly silence waiting to angrily attack! from under her benign surface errupted—off she went…too far. She lumped the two Big Mouths together! She started overlapping and confusing their comments. Oh yes she did.

But there is a Rush-said, Kirk-said difference.

And the difference in their judgmental messages of intolerance is that Rush did it for pure promotion and to fan the flames of the innate fear of his audience’s lust for How Things Were—you know, a straight-up old fashioned, rally-the-troops-in-an-election-year PR stunt—and that Kirk Cameron is a true believer (sorry, no caps. The Editor). He walks his talk and actually raises his kids to believe his brand of Old Testy biblical-ity and its fire and brimstone No No-isms. And while I can’t agree one scintilla with his beliefs, we’re both American through and through, and so I have and want to defend his right to say it. 

Rush’s story on the other hand, post-snowballing of lemming sponsor-dropping, PCesque Growing Pains cast distancing (and two weeks later and I’m still quoting Bill Maher’s, “He’s been married four times and still no kids. Why? Because he’s the birth control.”) is now picked up as the Freedom of Speech flag. Wrong! And by whom, but no other than my buddy Bill Maher protecting Rush as the poster boy of victimhood. But Maher’s just wrong (about this; I totally agree that Limbaugh = birthcontrol).

An old complex issue, made more twisty, turny than a pretzel with the addition of immediate reaction time of social media, which amps up a brighter spotlight on sponsors and their associated politics of profit margin.

What do you think?

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© 2010-2012 Simone da Rosa and PopSmartsZen™. All rights reserved.

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Jon Hamm: Mo’ Betta Male Role Models

4 Oct

Here’s reason #109 to love gorgeous Jon Hamm. Turns out he only plays a 1960′s sexist, womanizing cad on TV (AMC’s ‘Mad Men’) because he clearly knows women—and what he knows is our society needs better male role models. He spoke out against rape and its life-ruining legacy, and called for a more respectful culture. Now THAT’S swagger!

Spread this beauty.

SITE IMAGE NOTICE: The images used on this website are believed to be public domain. If you feel any of these images or videos are violating your copyright, please contact (popsmartszen@gmail.com) and we will remove them as soon as possible.

© 2010-2012 Simone da Rosa and PopSmartsZen™. All rights reserved.

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Rob Lowe Says No to: Do Drugs, Get a Career

2 May

I was never (ok, much) into pretty boys but the ’80s Brat Pack was All Attractive Vibes, All the Time (yeah and go, Demi, go!). So when the BP’s poster boy Rob Lowe was recently pimping his tell-all memoir on one of Oprah’s precious last weepi-sodes, I kinda half cared more. And it turned out Lowe did have some surprisingly thoughtful things to say (including sweetly and awkwardly side-stepping questions about old flames and sex tapes, his wife of 20+ years was front, center and all St. Elmo’s fired up) — like his take on his sobriety which demonstrated his maturity and gratitude for the rehab process and…the lucky, lucky life it helped him create.

He credits his sex tape scandal (what naive times!, today that’s a career-starter for the less-to-no talented) with shining a spotlight for him on his drinking, which in taking care of it, resulted in how he lives his life today. ”What it ends up doing is accelerating my alcohol stuff to where I finally get sober and I’ve been able to have the rest of my life that I’m so blessed with, which is now 20 years of sobriety. I don’t think any of it happens without that.”

And on the profundity of rehab: ”I was loving the ammunition I was getting to live my life and understanding things about myself that I never ever understood before. Rehab is a serious business for serious people. It’s not a place you go to get good publicity or escape the law or to rehabilitate your career, which unfortunately is what it’s become.”

Hope LiLo and company check in to their DVRs soon. — PopSmartsZen

SITE IMAGE NOTICE: The images used on this website are believed to be public domain. If you feel any of these images or videos are violating your copyright, please contact (popsmartszen@gmail.com) and we will remove them as soon as possible.

© 2010 Simone da Rosa and PopSmartsZen™. All rights reserved. 

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Improve By Date: 2012

13 Apr

Shirley MacLaine tells it like it is again, and again…and in this lifetime (and on the Oprah show), too. The actress, considered “kooky” back in the day for her well known beliefs in reincarnation, said that we better get it together because life as we know it will change after the (in-)famous Mayan calendar date of December 21, 2012. Warren Beatty’s older sister feels that there will be a huge awakening (of human) consciousness due to the earth’s solar system becoming aligned with the center of the galaxy then. No doomsayer, MacLaine believes that the earth will end as we know it but in a good way, not the Will Smith or Ben Affleck needing to don black suits and space surfing their missiles  to save the earth way.

Irma LaDouce in her Can-Can(ny) way  told Oprah, “We’re coming into an alignment… and it’s the first time in 26,000 years that this has occurred… This solar system is on direct alignment with the center of the galaxy.

“That carries with it a very profound electro-magnetic frequency… and gravitational pull, hence the weather. What does that do to consciousness? What does that do to our sense of reality?

“I know everyone is feeling this sense of speed, speed, speed and they don’t know what to do about it. I have a feeling… that the karmic drama of the laws of cause and effect, at the end of the 26,000 years, it is possible that we could be on the threshold of a new beginning. I think what this pressure – this kinda psychic spiritual pressure we’re all feeling – is about, what your internal soul is telling you is, ‘Get your act together!’”

I always liked that salty sweet lady, and not just because she played a high-kickin’ girl also named Simone. Work it, peeps! — PopSmartsZen

Image: Two Sisters for Sister Sara, Universal Studios

SITE IMAGE NOTICE: The images used on this website are believed to be public domain. If you feel any of these images or videos are violating your copyright, please contact (popsmartszen@gmail.com) and we will remove them as soon as possible.

© 2010 Simone da Rosa and PopSmartsZen™. All rights reserved.


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Clooney UnPoliticking “Truth”: I Drank the Bong Water

24 Feb

In my earlier bedhead, post-blog posting, Spam deleting, Aqua Aura-energized H20 drinking stupor, I was actually thinking about asking you this: How truthful are you? In our hyper-savvy age of over-stimulation and -information, strutting around like super models in, one can only hope, sustainable outer wear for Global Climate Change accessorized with evilly-designed planetary financial flip flops — do you really know who you are? And if you think you do, do you walk your talk? How can we expect today’s disaffected youth to have values that will sustain us in our old age (and assuming we leave them a planet to take up that hefty task on) with all the two-face smack talk we do individually, and in our media, our culture?

Hours later and still sans coffee, a full circle moment happened when I joy-read this lil diddy that George Clooney says no political career because of sex, drugs. It especially tickled PopSmarts’ pondering funny bone. Thank you, Dr. Doug Ross for that Rx of 2 Truths and the Morning After. Included among the reasons Clooney knows he wouldn’t make a good US political candidate are the facts that he — in his words to Newsweek magazine, “I didn’t live my life in the right way for politics, you know. I f– too many chicks and did too many drugs, and that’s the truth.”

Before today, truth be told, I always thought something — didn’t know what exactly — was wrong with that brilliant but rich aging player, yet do-gooder package. I wonder no more. He’s living his truths and that’s what is barely recognizable in our day and age. Oh. So we need to know ourselves, our truth in the two (at minimum) worlds we occupy in order to use our power for good. One of those paradoxes I tout so much, but in my own unnoticed growing jadedness, nearly couldn’t recognize. Oh.

Yes you of the political, actual human rights-affecting efforts. You slutty stoner you. You’re a funny truth teller I’d bring home to papa. — PopSmartsZen


SITE IMAGE NOTICE: The images used on this website are believed to be public domain. If you feel any of these images or videos are violating your copyright, please contact (popsmartszen@gmail.com) and we will remove them as soon as possible.

© 2010 Simone da Rosa and PopSmartsZen™. All rights reserved.

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“Fat Girl” Outs Dumb Reporter In Front of HIS Back

24 Jan

UPDATE: Congrats to fair player Kim Clijsters, Australia Cup WINNER!

[Thank you to Reelgirl for reminding me (post long weekend) to put this shining example of a strong atheletic woman calling out a gossiper who slammed her body image.]

Australian Open tennis winner Kim Clijsters called out courtside interviewer and former tennis player Todd Woodbridge for texting that “she looks pregnant” and that “‘she looks really grumpy and her boobs are bigger.’” What pro reportage, Todd!

A girlfriend forwarded Clijsters the text (dispelling girl-on-girl cattiness) that Woodbridge sent her, and Kim took that aced serve and ran with it. SportsCenter and other sports media outlets have been looping that saucy video clip for a lipsmacking, satisfying good time now.

Chicas of the world, when a winning female athlete is basically called “fat” and “moody” by a so-called professional media person (and d’ya getta load of that the gossip aspect?, niiice!), this is just another example of the perfectionist body image lies perpetuated by us all, and blindly accepted by same. Open your eyes and mouth, see the truth and speak up for yourself.

Todd’s response, “Well that’s the end of my TV career. Thank you very much!” You’re welcome. — PopSmartsZen

SITE IMAGE NOTICE: The images used on this website are believed to be public domain. If you feel any of these images or videos are violating your copyright, please contact (popsmartszen@gmail.com) and we will remove them as soon as possible.

© 2010 Simone da Rosa and PopSmartsZen™. All rights reserved.


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Sshhh! Women Overcoming Their Secret Garden

10 Dec

Secrets are only good on soap operas. In real life they can wreck relationships and cause mental anguish.

Smart and fierce globe-trotting journalist Lisa Ling had a secret. And it turned this confident and accomplished full-fledged woman’s world upside down. Ling had a miscarriage and wondered what she’d done wrong. She was sure she was alone on top of her secret guilt, this played havoc on her self-assuredness. When she found out how many of her friends and acquaintences suffered this same event silently and alone, Ling did something about it. She started a website called Secret Society of Women.

Is it any good? I don’t know because she publicized it on her old show, the very public ‘The View’, its servers were still freaking out when I logged in. Beyond the Home page, I could only get to About Us. PopSmarts can just imagine tantalizing page names like ‘Secrets’ and ‘Daily Wish’ and ‘Wisdom’ are jamming up traffic worse than on the 405 at rush hour.

Will you go to SSoW and confess all your deepest darkest secrets anonymously, find new compadres and find comfort — or do women like their secrets? If secrets aren’t healthy for your relationships or mental health, then why is our stereotypically caregiving gender especially good at harboring the darkest ones — and often for years and decades. Today’s secrets kept in, are good fodder for illness and disease tomorrow, y’know.

PopSmarts can’t endorse a site she’s not fully navigated, but she sure digs the idea of a world where fewer women are living lives of lies and often self-propagated shame. If you can’t manage to tell someone, and if the dark side of the web’s nature is kept at a minimum at this secrets-slaying site (e.g., possible abuse of intimacy by/and lies by the unstable or frustrated people with too much time on their mis-directed hands), and if this product of Lisa Ling’s authentic fabulosity rules, then — go tell your secrets to this new mountain and start living truthfully and in the light, people.   — PopSmartsZen

Image: laurel_blogger


SITE IMAGE NOTICE: The images used on this website are believed to be public domain. If you feel any of these images or videos are violating your copyright, please contact (popsmartszen@gmail.com) and we will remove them as soon as possible.

© 2010 Simone da Rosa and PopSmartsZen™. All rights reserved.

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Snooki Plays Hamster, Guidette Holiday Ball

9 Dec

10-9-8-7… it’s on! MTV is stuffing its most famous orange ‘Jersey Shore’ guidette and smurf Nicole “Snookie” Polizzi inside a giant countdown ball and dropping her like it’s hot in  New York’s Times Square on news years eve. Despite her teeny stature, that’s going to have to be one ginormous ball to house the famous Snookie bump. Tawk about helmat hah. I mock but you know I’ll watch, if only to see this cultural false idol levitate in plastic. David Blaine’s got nothing on you, Snooks, you stylin’ hamster. — PopSmartsZen

SITE IMAGE NOTICE: The images used on this website are believed to be public domain. If you feel any of these images or videos are violating your copyright, please contact (popsmartszen@gmail.com) and we will remove them as soon as possible.

© 2010 Simone da Rosa and PopSmartsZen™. All rights reserved.

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GQ Full Of ‘GLEE’: Sexing Up Teens

21 Oct

Oops!, pouty teen girls draped on school lockers did it again. That is, made ya double take with fascinated (or –ingly faux) shock, and then stare blatantly. Parents groups are going bonkers and for the Parents Television Council, GQ’s November photo spread “borders on pedophilia” by sexing up the teen characters (played by Lea Michele and Dianna Argon, both 24, and for which Aragon somewhat ramblingly apologizes) of the hit high school TV show ‘Glee’. A show about an underdog clique. Huh. For those unfamiliar with the show, these images are absolutely not truth in advertising. Furthermore, as if illustrating how conflicted and split our culture’s views of sexuality (and girls, and youth) are, the day after the cover was announced, People’s reader poll was a close shave at 51-49% Yes the photos are too racy.

But all this hoo-ha isn’t as much about a men’s fashion mag (GQ: Look sharp, Live smart) sexualizing female youth (‘Glee’ male co-star Cory Monteith is fully clothed, with his hands on his co-stars’ booties) in a medium readily accessible to impressionable children’s eyes and minds — it’s predominantly a really, really great press stunt to sell more GQ mags at the expense of sexualizing female youth and warping impressionable minds of future loyal readers.

If this was really about borderline pedophilia, where was the outrage over actual teenaged Taylor Lautner’s (confusing because like Michele and Aragon, he’s of age at 18) bemused but non-patronizing profile and spread this summer pimping sartorial porn ($625 button downs and $745 six-pack-hugging T-shirts, and jeans that have such difficulty staying buttoned, apparently the wearer would be wise to lay down on a bed topless to do so)? Ever since I was an impressionable child under the 18-end of GQ’s 18-49 year old demographic, my vague sense of GQ was that it was a men’s fashion magazine with eh-so-what metro sexual (just not labeled that then) if not biblically strongly homoerotic leanings. To both, so what? If I equally vaguely recall feeling that it was cool guys had a mag that told them how to rag fashionably (if a bit staidly back in the day), I do clearly remember semi-gloating that its great looking glossiness would never evoke emotion (precisely because of its staid airs and implied correct rules of dressing) as much as the pervasive women’s pubs that did the same thing (albeit with a lot more pink lipstick) — and isn’t that how we buy something/-one?, via emotional impulse/response?

So is this new fangled trend all the kids are doing now of selling things with sex going to irrevocably warp their minds and provoke the ire of sexist terrorists the world over? I say: probably, because if it ain’t broke… The one thing I’d like to see change is our culture’s attitude that a young girl/woman’s sexuality needs more lamblike protecting than that of our young boys/men’s minds, attitudes, and actual sexuality (Mary Kay Letourneau/Debra Lafave much, anyone?).

How does the GQ sexed up images of styled-as-under-aged girls in an adult men’s magazine make you feel? Will you let your young son or daughter look at it? Why or how is the sexualization of young girls/women worse than that of their male counterparts?  — PopSmarts

Image: Terry Richardson/GQ

SITE IMAGE NOTICE: The images used on this website are believed to be public domain. If you feel any of these images or videos are violating your copyright, please contact (popsmartszen@gmail.com) and we will remove them as soon as possible.

© 2010 Simone da Rosa and PopSmartsZen™. All rights reserved.

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